- HALLOWEEN IS TWO WEEKS AWAY,
BUT I'M ALREADY STARTING TO SEE SCARY THINGS EVERYWHERE
LIKE JACK-O'-LANTERNS AND GIANT SPIDERS
AND MEN WHO TUCK THEIR SWEATERS INTO THEIR PANTS.
AND THE BEST PART OF HALLOWEEN
IS SEEING ALL THE CUTE KIDS IN COSTUMES.
IF YOU HAVEN'T FIGURED OUT WHAT YOUR KIDS ARE GONNA BE YET,
I HAVE A FEW SUGGESTIONS.
SO LET'S SEE THE FIRST ONE RIGHT NOW.
PLEASE COME ON OUT.
[cheers and applause]
HI, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
- COLE. - COLE?
HOW OLD ARE YOU?
- EIGHT. - EIGHT?
AND WHAT GRADE ARE YOU IN?
- SECOND.
- ARE YOU MARRIED?
- NO.
- OKAY, ALL RIGHT.
AND YOU ARE-- WHAT IS YOUR COSTUME?
WHAT ARE YOU? - A WRECKING BALL.
- A WRECKING BALL.
[cheers and applause]
YEAH.
THAT'S A GREAT COSTUME.
YOU JUST REALLY NEED-- IT'S VERY EASY.
LOOK WHAT YOU'RE GONNA GET RIGHT THERE.
ALL THAT. JUST A WRECKING BALL.
WAIT. COME BACK.
UH, GO AHEAD.
OH, WAIT.
NO, IT'S GOOD. GO AHEAD.
[laughter]
ALL RIGHT.
[cheers and applause]
WAIT, COME HERE.
COME HERE JUST ONE SEC.
NO, NO, I'M JUST-- NO.
[laughter]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE THE NEXT ONE.
[cheers and applause]
HI THERE. STEP ON UP A TINY BIT MORE.
AND WHAT IS YOUR NAME? - NORA.
- HI, NORA. HOW OLD ARE YOU?
- SEVEN. - SEVEN?
YOU'RE IN SCHOOL? - UH-HUH.
- ARE YOU IN FIRST GRADE?
- SECOND. - SECOND GRADE.
WOW, AND WHAT ARE YOU STUDYING IN SECOND GRADE?
- KOREAN AND ENGLISH. - REALLY?
WOW, THAT'S DIFFERENT THAN WHEN I WAS GROWING UP.
[laughter]
AND WHAT ARE YOU?
- I AM A NEW IPHONE.
- YOU'RE THE IPHONE 5. YEAH.
BUT LET'S MAKE IT SCARY, OKAY?
HERE. WATCH.
[groans]
YOU'RE LOW ON BATTERY. OH, NO!
OH! [laughter]
NO!
[applause]
GO FIND AN OUTLET. QUICK!
[cheers and applause]
ALL RIGHT.
LET'S SEE THE NEXT ONE. COME ON OUT.
[cheers and applause]
COME ON OUT.
HI THERE. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
- SOPHIA.
- HI, SOPHIA. HOW OLD ARE YOU?
- FIVE YEARS OLD. - FIVE YEARS OLD.
ARE YOU IN SCHOOL?
- YES. - WHAT ARE YOU STUDYING?
- I'M STUDYING KOREAN AND ENGLISH.
[laughter]
- OKAY.
AND WHAT ARE YOU?
- I'M A COMPASS. - YOU'RE A COMPASS.
'CAUSE THERE'S NORTH AND WEST AND EAST AND SOUTH.
AND LOOK, IF I JUST DO THIS, IF I TAKE THIS AWAY,
AND IF I TAKE THIS AWAY,
NOW YOU'RE JUST ONE DIRECTION.
[laughter]
OR I COULD GIVE YOU BACK THIS.
AND IF YOU JUST HEAD IN NORTH WEST,
YOU COULD BE KIM AND KANYE'S CHILD, NORTH WEST.
[applause]
YOU'LL LAUGH AT THAT SOMEDAY.
[laughter]
ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
THAT WAS WONDERFUL.
WE HAVE ONE MORE.
[cheers and applause]
COME ON OUT.
[cheers and applause]
HI. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
- EVELYN. - EVELYN.
HOW OLD ARE YOU?
- SEVEN. - SEVEN YEARS OLD.
AND...
WHAT ARE YOU?
- MOUNT RUSHMORE.
- UH-HUH.
WELL, I THINK I HAVE TO ADD SOMETHING TO THAT.
I THINK--
[laughter]
J.C. PENNEY WANTS TO MAKE EVERY DAY MAGICAL,
SO THEY LAUNCHED THEIR DISNEY SHOP AT J.C. PENNEY
WHERE YOU CAN FIND APPAREL, ACCESSORIES, AND TOYS
ALL AT AFFORDABLE PRICES.
AND FOR HELPING ME TODAY,
YOU'RE EACH GETTING A $500 GIFT CARD
TO THE DISNEY SHOP AT J.C. PENNEY.
[cheers and applause]
ONE MORE COSTUME A LITTLE LATER.
ALL RIGHT, I HAVE ONE MORE COSTUME TO SHOW YOU.
COME ON OUT.
[cheers and applause]
- WHAT'S YOUR NAME? - JENNIFER.
- HI, JENNIFER.
HOW OLD ARE YOU? - SIX.
- YOU'RE SIX YEARS OLD? ARE YOU IN SCHOOL?
- YEAH. - WHAT ARE YOU STUDYING?
- UH, I DON'T KNOW.
[laughter] - OKAY.
KOREAN?
- NO. - OKAY.
AND WHAT ARE YOU?
- MILEY CYRUS' TONGUE.
- OKAY, GOOD.
[laughter]
OH.
WE HAVE TO FACE YOU THIS WAY SO PEOPLE UNDERSTAND.
[laughter]
LET ME GIVE YOU SOME CANDY RIGHT HERE.
AND... - THANK YOU.
- YOU'RE WELCOME. THANK YOU.
AND ALSO...
I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A LITTLE MINT ON YOUR TONGUE.
[cheers and applause]
ALSO...
I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A $500 J.C. PENNEY GIFT CARD
SO YOU CAN GO TO THE DISNEY SHOP.
[cheers and applause]
AND I WANT TO THANK QUICKLY OWEN WILSON
AND WOODY HARRELSON AND ROSIE PEREZ.
SEE YOU TOMORROW. BE KIND TO ONE ANOTHER.
BYE-BYE.
[cheers and applause]
